You just can’t make this up. In two parts.

Former French President Chirac

hospitalised after mauling by his clinically depressed poodle

Former French president Jacques Chirac was rushed to hospital after being mauled by his own ‘clinically depressed’ pet dog.

The 76-year-old statesman was savaged by his white Maltese dog – which suffers from frenzied fits and is being treated with anti-depressants.

The animal, named Sumo, had become increasingly violent over the past years and was prone to making ‘vicious, unprovoked attacks’, Chirac’s wife Bernadette said.

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And then, er….The President and Mrs. Obama do a lot of fisting?

Update: Thank you, TSS.  Where would I be without my monkies?

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